Page 1

HBBS Newsletter Comic Section

Is it Fact or Fiction or is it all just a joke!?

Dear Customers,

HBBS LLC products are now carrying the new “HBBS Fantasy Disorder” advisory sticker.
Its been brought to our attention that users of HBBS products frequently come down with HBBS Fantasy Disorder. Symptoms are as follows.

1. A sudden urge to debate the 410 ga as a useful firearm.

2. An over active imagination, and seeing things that are not real. Some report seeing groups fired from 410 ga at 100 – 300 yards as good as most rifles.

3. Suddenly entering shooting contests with a firearm known to be useless and thinking they may win, place, or show.

4. Make claims of killing deer at over 200 yds with a 410 ga.

5. Have sudden moments of creativity in firearms and load development related to the 410 ga, in attempts to fuel more fantasy.

6. Some sell all other slug guns and keep a 410 ga. Extreme cases sell all other slug guns first then buy a .410 ga.

7. Become the butt of frequent jokes related to the use of a 410 ga.

8. Could experience loss of personal relationships with hunting party members due to delusional actions and stories told while hunting.

9. May hang tree stands in places that are likely to produce shots known to be out of slug gun range.

10. Actively searches for other victims of HBBS Fantasy Disorder which worsens the condition.

11. Become combative and refuse to face reality when friends and family attempt to talk them out of a fantasy episode.

12. Sudden urge to buy more deer tags to fill with a 410ga.

13. Advanced stages bring about the desire for more HBBS products on birthdays, anniversaries, Christmas, or just any payday. Extreme cases then want to use said new products on birthdays, anniversaries, Christmas and every weekend.

HBBS LLC apologizes for any and all inconvenience this condition has caused you. In the future HBBS LLC will clearly mark each and every product with a HBBS Fantasy Disorder advisory sticker. HBBS LLC is not liable for damages or consequences that result from HBBS fantasy disorder, However call 1-800-555-HBBS-HELP Hotline for location of nearest treatment center or lead affected persons to nearest internet connection for viewing of HBBS website.

Do not be fooled by counterfeit products or inadequate HBBS Fantasy Disorder advisories. The only complete and approved HBBS Fantasy Disorder advisory sticker appears as shown below. Affected persons should remove the sticker from HBBS products and place in a conspicuous place as a sign of progress.

Page 2

MWDC

Dedicated to Preserving the Whitetail Deer Herd

Established 1948

Midwest Whitetail Deer Council

410 Bean Field Avenue

Buck Run, Ohio

September 4, 2011

HBBS Pathogen outbreak requires new safety zone standard

Dear Buck,

We are advising all members of the Midwestern Deer Herd to avoid all open areas during the up coming 2011 deer shotgun seasons!! It is also advised you restrict all movement to and from bedding and feeding areas to 1-2 hours before daylight and after sunset and also stop all breeding and rut activity during restricted hours.

Taking these actions will help prevent any chance encounters of humans dressed in blaze orange that typically carry air borne pathogens that can strike from long distances affecting internal vital organs, mainly the heart and lungs. Also note these pathogens sometimes completely shut down the central nervous system.

Health and safety issues for the Midwestern Deer Herd members especially during the peak months of November and December for these deadly pathogens, are not letting up. The Sabot outbreak which has lasted for decades has developed into more deadly strains like the SST Hornady Pathogen, Hasting, Remington, Winchester strains we all fear and hope to avoid.

The Midwestern Whitetail Deer Council has been investigating the rumored outbreak of the HBBS pathogen which was reported as early as 2000 in areas of Ohio, mainly in the counties of Darke, Miami, and Adams. Reports are of single hunters infecting multiple deer; in all cases the pathogen caused nearly instant death as reported by herd members who witnessed the outbreaks. Deer herd members who were present reported the recommended safety zone of 200 yards was not an effective safeguard against the HBBS pathogen. The MWDC has extended the safety zone to 300 yards where the HBBS pathogen is known to exist. All areas in the following states: Ohio, Indiana, Michigan, Minnesota, Pennsylvania, South Carolina, and Louisiana require the new safe distance as well as adjacent counties in neighboring states.

In a most unprecedented move, the ODNR has taken steps to quarantine the most deadly strain of the HBBS pathogen known as the HBBS Brass Case variety and it has been successfully quarantined in all Ohio counties.

MWDC will continue to monitor the HBBS outbreaks and update required minimum safe distances to be maintained from blaze orange humans who carry the HBBS pathogen during the annual hunting rituals in November and December. MWDC fears the HBBS pathogen will be spreading and mutating into a threat to all deer in all 50 states. It has also confirmed the HBBS pathogen has the same deadly effects on all big game in North America; confirmed by the Wild Hog Council (WHC) and other reliable sources

MWDC Safety Bulletin 9/13/2011 – HBBS Outbreak, new safety zone

Page 3

MWDC Newsletter September 2011

Dedicated to Preserving the Whitetail Deer Herd

Established 1948

Midwest Whitetail Deer Council

410 Bean Field Avenue

Buck Run, Ohio

Rumored Super .410 must be stopped!

MWDC seeks answers to possible violations.

MWDC has been investigating mysterious causes of death of whitetail deer first seen in 1999 at Darke County check stations. ODNR state wildlife experts were completely puzzled and unable to determine exact cause of death. One Official remarked the damage was horrific. Deer carcasses had severe damage to vital organs with huge gaping lesions on both sides of the body, always located in the chest area with one side having a bigger lesion than the other. The carcasses were examined by scientific experts hired by the MWDC who quickly dismissed the HBBS .410 in the hunter’s possession.

The hunter in question has repeatedly year after year turned in deer with this severe damage, always claiming to have used a 410 ga. He has tagged deer in multiple counties, some years using all possible deer tags, taking maximum number of deer year after year. The cumulative affect on the entire deer herd of Ohio has been devastating; it is rumored this man and his .410 are responsible for declining deer populations in at least 25% of the entire state!

MWDC is offering 1,000,000 dollar reward for proof of foul play going back to 1999; this pattern has gone on for 11 seasons without proof or convictions. From the beginning, ODNR found nothing wrong with the gun in question and MWDC scientific experts originally dismissed it without thorough examination after finding it was a 410. If proof of this hunter’s use of some super .410 exists, MWDC wants it banned from existence. MWDC experts project at the rate of decline in this hunter’s home county, deer will be completely wiped out by 2020 and in unsustainable numbers in the rest of his affected hunting areas. The man must be stopped! MWDC must and will succeed!

Donations to stop the slaughter call 1-800-555-stop the 410 killer.

Funded by MWDC Safety Committee, Slander Committee, Committee to Ban All Hunting, Bambi is in Danger Committee!, “Beef, its whats for supper” Committee, and the Last Resort Committee to Save Our A**